How To Answer The Phone With Humor: 31 Funny Lines to Make People Laugh


Have you ever gotten a call from somebody that you really didn’t want to talk to? Have you ever had the awful feeling of snubbing someone or rejecting their call? If so, if you don’t want to be that person again, take a look at these hilarious ways to answer the phone with humor. They are sure to make people laugh out loud and put them in a good mood as well!

You don’t have to be in-person with the person you’re talking to to make them laugh. With these quick, easy, and hilarious call-backs, even the most introverted person will find a way to become more extroverted.

  1. “Hello, this is your doctor speaking.”
  2. “Oh, hi there. What do you think of my new hair?”
  3. “I’m sorry if I kept you waiting, but I was doing my crossword puzzle.”
  4. “Typos happen.”
  5. “This isn’t a real phone number.”
  6. “Department of Redundancy Department.”
  7. “This is a joke and you’re not funny.”
  8. “Wanna hear a joke?”
  9. “Hello!”- Yes, they’re talking to you!
  10. “No, that was my wife” – Just kidding! It’s your boss!
  11. “We can actually talk about this over Twitter?” – In other words…
  12. “You must be from out of town.” – I guess that makes sense
  13. “I’m sorry, who?”- That’s right. You’re invisible
  14. “What do you want?”- Oh.
  15. “911, what’s your emergency?”
  16. “Ooooooh, it’s a lady.”
  17. “You are gonna be my new phone buddy.”
  18. “You have to say the magic word!”
  19. “Is this the mayor’s office?”
  20. “What color is this dress?”
  21. BURP!
  22. Laugh like crazy ““Hee Hee Huu Huu Haa Haa.”
  23. “I just wanted to let you know that I’m quite sure you’re not a woman.”
  24. “How did you get this number?”
  25. “We have a very strict policy about our employees giving out personal information.”
  26. “Are you having a bad day?”
  27. “What are your thoughts on mimes?”
  28. “Exactly what the hell would you like?”
  29. “If I hear one more word from you I’m going to start throwing things at the wall.”
  30. “It sounds like you’re talking through your armpits.”
  31. “Just another day in paradise!”

Compliment someone else

One of the best ways to start a conversation is complimenting someone. As soon as you compliment someone, their mood changes and they’re more willing to engage in conversation. In addition to being funny, this also shows that you’re interested in the person you’re talking to.

You can compliment someone while on the phone by saying something like “Hey, I love your shirt” or “Your hair looks great today”.

Know what people want to hear

The best way to make someone laugh is to be funny. And the best way to be funny is to know what people want to hear—familiarity breeds humor.

So, before you answer the phone, pay attention. What do people find funny? Pick up some cartoons on your phone or go online for some jokes and try them out. You might find that something that doesn’t make you laugh at first makes sense when you’re telling it over the phone.

And even if someone calls you from a number you don’t recognize, listen to what they say first before answering. There may be something familiar in their conversation that makes them sound like an old friend asking for a favor rather than a telemarketer.

The first thing you should know is that people like to hear their problem solved. If you want to make someone laugh, start off with some witty solution to a common problem.

You can also do something different and say things like: “I’m not your mother,” or “I don’t speak Spanish.”

Talk about something you know well

If you want to make someone laugh, one of the easiest ways to do it is by telling a personal story. It’s something that’s unique to your life, and they might not have heard it before.

But sometimes it can be hard to think of something funny to say on the phone. If you find yourself struggling for a good call-in joke, try talking about something you know well. Whether that be a topic in your work or personal life, or even just a hobby, it will make you more relatable and more likely to hear laughter coming from the other end of the line.

Want an easy example? Let’s say you’re talking with your friend about their latest trip abroad. Ask them if they had any trouble getting around and share something that happened to you when you were in another country. Remember what it was like navigating on public transportation in Istanbul? Or how you always got lost in Venice? They’ll remember those moments too … and laugh with you!

Say funny things about yourself and make fun of yourself (joke about being an introvert)

When you answer the phone, it’s never a good idea to start with a serious tone. Instead, try making fun of yourself and make people laugh.

For example, if you’re an introvert, tell them that you’ve been on social media for three hours just to work up the courage to call them. If you are sporty, say something like “I’m sorry I smell like a running shoe.” It’s always easy to be creative about your personal attributes and use them as the basis for humor.

The best part is that it doesn’t have to take long for you to consider new jokes—you could always come up with funny things about yourself in five seconds or less.

Keep it short, sweet, and to the point

When you answer your phone, you’re probably feeling rushed and only have a few seconds to make a good impression. In this case, it’s important to keep your conversation short and sweet.

The most important thing to remember when you answer the phone is that it’s not as easy as it looks. Sure, you can say something funny and make people laugh, but that’s not what a phone call is for.

A phone call is for sharing information with a valuable contact such as your boss or client. It’s about letting them know what’s going on in your life and making sure they’re aware of everything that has been happening recently.

If you have any questions about the person on the other end of the line or if there’s anything else you need to discuss, feel free to do so at that time. Chief among these things, however, should be good manners. So keep your call short, sweet, and to the point so that you don’t come across as someone who doesn’t know how to act with others.

It can be hard to be funny, especially when you’re on the phone. If you want to make someone laugh, there are plenty of hilarious ways to do it that might not even cross your mind.

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